Our Getaway Trip

   Five weeks after we lost Thomas, my husband and I took a getaway trip to Destin, Fl. Since we had been there before, we knew what a beautiful and relaxing place it was. We just felt the need to get out of Missouri, see the ocean and walk on the sand. So we drove the 11 hours down to Destin from St. Louis. I was afraid it was going to be a miserable drive, since we left the day of his due date, and we were both so depressed. But it was actually very therapeutic. We opened up to each other on that long drive like we never had before. Sometimes we talked about Thomas, and other times we didn't. We learned so about each other. I truly believe that tragedy either makes or breaks a relationship. I have heard that couples who have experienced a loss of a child, have a 80% divorce rate. But we don't think we fit into that category. We have never been closer. My husband is the ONLY person on this earth who knows exactly how I feel. And we have never loved or appreciated each other more than we do now.

   While in Destin, we felt so close to our son. I think since his nursery was decorated in a nautical/ship theme, seeing all of the boats at the harbor and in the ocean had a special meaning to us. I know Thomas would have loved to see all of those ships! Turtles also have a special meaning as well. Thomas's baby swing and pack n' play were decorated with turtles. He was also buried with a turtle stuffed animal and tiny turtle ring that his daddy had when he was a kid. So throughout the trip, we collected tons of turtle souvenirs! We also wrote his name in the sand, along with all of the angel babies of the parents in our monthly support group we attend. We just felt the need to honor Thomas and all of his friends in heaven. We printed out pictures and gave them to our angel mommies and daddies the following week after we returned.

   I will cherish that trip forever. Connecting with my husband again after the pain we have endured means the world to me. And we are counting down the weeks until we go back this fall:)